Nuts make for great riddle topics. They come in many varieties, have interesting characteristics, and are fun foods that most people are familiar with. In this article, we’ve collected 71 nutty riddles for you to enjoy. Some may make you chuckle, others may leave you stumped. See how many you can get right!
General Nut Riddles
Let’s start with some general riddles about nuts:
Riddle 1
What do you call nuts that have gone crazy?
Answer: In-sanity!
Riddle 2
What kind of nut is quick to anger?
Answer: A hot-headed pistachio!
Riddle 3
Why did the nuts have to leave the cocktail party early?
Answer: They were feeling a little shell-fish!
Riddle 4
Which nuts have knowledge of the future?
Answer: Fortune-tellers!
Riddle 5
What do you call a nut that works as a farmhand?
Answer: A pecan picker!
Riddle 6
Why was the macadamia nut embarrassed?
Answer: It was because everyone saw it without its shell!
Riddle 7
What do you call nuts that cross busy streets?
Answer: Jay-walkers!
Riddle 8
Which nuts are the most flexible?
Answer: Cashews, because they are so bendy and twisty!
Riddle 9
What did the peanut say when it got stepped on?
Answer: Ow! Quit goober stomping on me!
Riddle 10
Why did the almonds get suspended from school?
Answer: They were caught hazel-nutting the teacher’s car!
Peanut Riddles
Now here are some riddles specific to peanuts:
Riddle 11
Why don’t elephants like peanuts?
Answer: Because they’re too small to be nuts to elephants!
Riddle 12
What do you call a peanut in a spacesuit?
Answer: An astronut!
Riddle 13
How do peanuts talk to each other?
Answer: On their shell phones!
Riddle 14
What did the peanut say to the other peanut?
Answer: Nothing, peanuts can’t talk!
Riddle 15
Why did the peanut cry?
Answer: Because it had a-salt-ed!
Riddle 16
What did the baby peanut say to its mom?
Answer: I love you a cashew!
Riddle 17
What happened to the peanut that went to outer space?
Answer: It became a meteorite!
Riddle 18
What do you call a peanut politician?
Answer: A peanut democra-seed!
Riddle 19
How does a peanut answer the phone?
Answer: Yellow?
Riddle 20
What did one peanut say to the other peanut at the ball?
Answer: Shall we dance?
Almond Riddles
Let’s go nuts for almonds with these riddles:
Riddle 21
Why couldn’t the almond play soccer?
Answer: It was injured and had to sit on the bench!
Riddle 22
What did the almond say to the other almond?
Answer: I find you very a-peeling!
Riddle 23
Why were the almonds so noisy in class?
Answer: They couldn’t help goofing almond!
Riddle 24
What’s an almond’s favorite fairy tale?
Answer: The Princess and the Peanut!
Riddle 25
Why was the almond teacher so frustrated?
Answer: Her students were driving her nuts!
Riddle 26
What did the almond dressing say to the salad?
Answer: Olive you!
Riddle 27
How do almonds travel through space?
Answer: On comets!
Riddle 28
Why did the almond cross the road?
Answer: To get to the nut house!
Riddle 29
What do you get if you drop an almond in volcano?
Answer: Roasted almond!
Riddle 30
Why are almonds never lonely?
Answer: They always come in pairs!
Cashew Riddles
These riddles are a little nutty, cashew what I mean?
Riddle 31
Why did the cashews get kicked out of band class?
Answer: They were being too nutty!
Riddle 32
What do you call two cashews in love?
Answer: Cashew nuts about each other!
Riddle 33
What do you get when you cross a cashew with a lamb?
Answer: A sheepish nut!
Riddle 34
Why did the cashew read the same book twice?
Answer: It was nuts about it!
Riddle 35
What’s a cashew’s favorite sport?
Answer: Bowling, because they have the perfect shape for it!
Riddle 36
Why are cashews never angry?
Answer: It’s against their nature!
Riddle 37
What’s a cashew’s least favorite day?
Answer: SUNday, because they’ll get roasted!
Riddle 38
Why was the cashew hired as a builder?
Answer: It was an expert on nuts and bolts!
Riddle 39
What sits beside a cashew choir and waves a stick?
Answer: The con-nut-tor!
Riddle 40
What do you call a cashew that works at a hospital?
Answer: A cashew-alist!
Pistachio Riddles
Pistachio lovers rejoice – this section is full of riddles about your favorite green nut!
Riddle 41
Why did the pistachio blush?
Answer: It saw the cashew naked!
Riddle 42
What did the pistachio say to the squirrel?
Answer: Sorry, I’m pistachio-nly interested in squirrels who do karate!
Riddle 43
Why don’t snakes eat pistachios?
Answer: They can’t get the shells open!
Riddle 44
How do you know if a pistachio is mad at you?
Answer: It gives you the silent treat-meant!
Riddle 45
What key is best for opening a pistachio?
Answer: A monkey wrench!
Riddle 46
Why did the police arrest the pistachio?
Answer: It was holding someone up!
Riddle 47
What do you call a pistachio who works as a doctor?
Answer: A pistachio-trician!
Riddle 48
Why do scuba divers bring pistachios on dives?
Answer: In case they get hun-gry under water!
Riddle 49
What did the pistachio say to his sweetheart?
Answer: You’re the apple of my pie!
Riddle 50
Why did the pistachio cross the road?
Answer: To get to its regular spitting spot!
Walnut Riddles
Let’s crack some walnut riddles now:
Riddle 51
What do you call a walnut that flies planes?
Answer: A pilot nut!
Riddle 52
Why are walnuts such great dancers?
Answer: They are always breaking out into shell-abration!
Riddle 53
What’s a walnut’s favorite place to go hiking?
Answer: Pistachio National Park!
Riddle 54
Why do walnuts have trouble keeping secrets?
Answer: They always end up cracking under pressure!
Riddle 55
What’s a walnut’s favorite TV show?
Answer: The Nutty Professor!
Riddle 56
How does a walnut spy on people?
Answer: With its surveillance nutwork!
Riddle 57
Why did the walnut turn red?
Answer: It was really mad about something!
Riddle 58
What do you call a crazy walnut?
Answer: One that’s nutty as a fruitcake!
Riddle 59
What’s a walnut’s favorite TV channel?
Answer: The Cooking Nutwork!
Riddle 60
Why do walnuts make great baseball players?
Answer: Because they’re good at bat!
Macadamia Nut Riddles
Let’s get tropical with these macadamia nut riddles now:
Riddle 61
Where do macadamia nuts go to dance?
Answer: Pistachio balls!
Riddle 62
Why are macadamia nuts so wrinkly?
Answer: They have extremely dry skin!
Riddle 63
What happened to the macadamia that missed the bus?
Answer: It went nuts waiting around for another one!
Riddle 64
Why did the macadamia climb the coconut tree?
Answer: It was going nuts trying to get some coconut milk!
Riddle 65
What do you call a psychic macadamia nut?
Answer: A fortune teller nut!
Riddle 66
Why can’t macadamia nuts keep secrets?
Answer: They always end up blabbing their mouths off!
Riddle 67
Why was the macadamia so upset after school?
Answer: All the other nuts made fun of its clothes!
Riddle 68
Where do macadamias go every morning?
Answer: To nut-rition class!
Riddle 69
Why was the macadamia nut afraid to sing?
Answer: It was tone deaf!
Riddle 70
How did the macadamia propose to his girlfriend?
Answer: With a diamond cashew!
Riddle 71
Why did the macadamia break up with his pistachio girlfriend?
Answer: Their love just wasn’t meant to be – it was nuts!
Conclusion
There you have it – 71 nutty riddles to make you giggle and scratch your head! Nuts sure make for silly topics when coming up with riddles. Whether it’s peanuts, almonds, cashews or macadamias, these tasty treats give us lots of comedic fodder to work with. So gather some friends, break out the mixed nuts and see who can get the most riddles right. Just be prepared for lots of groans and laughs along the way!
