Zombies are popular horror figures that lend themselves well to riddles and brain teasers. Here are 97 riddles about zombies along with their answers.
Zombie Riddles
What do zombies like to eat in the morning? Human cereal.
Where do zombies go for summer vacation? The Dead Sea.
What do you call a zombie who cooks stir fry? Dead man wok-ing.
Why don’t zombies ever oversleep? They have a lot of alarm clocks that won’t die.
Why did the zombie get a promotion at work? He had a lot of living experience.
How do zombies communicate? With dead-to-dead transmission.
Why do zombies make good dancers? They know all the coffin dance moves.
What did the zombie say when he lost his truck keys? “Where are my carrrr keys?”
How do zombies get around? By de-composed transportation.
Why can’t zombies play cards? Because they always throw up their hands when they lose.
What’s a zombie’s favorite comedy? The walking deadpan.
What do you call a zombie who does magic tricks? Harry Rotter.
What do zombies use to start their campfires? Matches that are deader than they are.
What’s a zombie’s favorite breakfast food? Scrambled brains and eggs.
Where do zombies go on vacation? The Dead Sea.
What do zombies use to make phone calls? A Dead Cell.
Why don’t zombies have their own web sites? They can’t maintain a domain.
How do zombies propose to their lovers? With an engagement ring pop out of their chest.
Why can’t you play hide and seek with a zombie? Because it’s always a dead giveaway.
What happens when a zombie walks into a bar? He orders one shot for himself and a round for the house.
Why did the zombie cross the road? To eat the chicken on the other side.
How do zombies get fit? Dead lifts at the gym.
What’s a zombie’s favorite candy? Milky Ways – they like their brains a little on the milky side.
What do zombies say when they bump into someone? “Pardon my grave.”
Why are zombies so calm? Not much gets under their skin.
What’s a zombie’s favorite fruit? Nec-tarines.
How do zombies tell their future? By looking into dead balls.
What do you call a zombie who does karate? Jackie Dead.
Why do zombies hate the winter so much? Because of the cold dead of winter.
What’s a zombie’s favorite sport? Decomposing.
Why do zombies make great gardeners? They’re fantastic at deadheading.
What do you call a zombie who also happens to be your dad? Pop dead.
What’s a zombie’s favorite musical instrument? The tomb-bone.
How does a zombie cook dinner? They first marinate the fingers, then roast the hand, and serve with a side brain salad.
Why did the zombie lost his job? His people skills were dead awful.
What did the zombie chef serve for dinner? Hand sanitizer.
What do zombies drink at breakfast? Coffin and tea.
How do zombies keep in touch with each other? Insta-grim.
Why are zombies so good at Trivial Pursuit? They retain lots of useless information.
What’s a zombie’s least favorite food? Fast food – they prefer slow humans.
How does a zombie stop a video? By hitting pause – then they decompose.
Why don’t zombies take coffee breaks? It keeps them up all day.
What’s a zombie’s favorite place to shop for makeup? Sephormal.
How do zombies get their mail? The morgue office.
What do you call a happy zombie? Delighted.
What do you call a cranky zombie? Decomposed.
What’s a zombie’s favorite magazine? Tomb and Garden.
Why are zombies so good at hockey? They have great puck handling skills.
What did the zombie dog say to its owner? “Barrowororooroo!”
What do you call a zombie who does stand up comedy? A deadpan comedian.
Why did the zombie quit drinking? Because he lost his taste for alcohol.
What’s a zombie’s favorite dessert? Graveyard cake with tombstone cookies.
What do you call a zombie who is also a plumber? A deadhead plumber.
How do zombies flirt? By asking if you have the guts to go out with them.
Spooky Zombie Riddles
Where do baby zombies come from? The dead baby store.
What happens if you eat zombie brains? You slowly start craving more.
What’s the only way to permanently get rid of a zombie? Headshot with a shotgun.
What’s the only thing zombies fear? Being extinct.
Why are zombies so good at baseball? They always go for the brains.
What do you call a zombie magician? A necromancer.
What’s the zombie’s motto? “Join us or be eaten!”
Why don’t zombies have their own restaurants? The only thing on the menu would be human flesh.
What’s the worst zombie disease? The dreaded bite of the zombie mosquito.
How can you stop a zombie hoard? Divert them with offerings of human meat.
What happens when a zombie falls in love? Their heart starts beating again.
Why are zombies the undead? Because they are living dead, not fully alive but not completely gone.
How do zombies party? They turn up the volume to wake the dead.
Where do zombies buy their Halloween costumes? At Party Dead stores.
What happens if a zombie bites a vampire? Nothing much – they are both already undead.
Why don’t zombies live in apartments? Not enough flesh to go around.
How did the zombie find true love? On deadharmony.com.
What do you call a zombie with a six pack? Dead fit.
Why don’t zombies go on blind dates? Their dates can see they are dead on arrival.
Why do zombies like to tell jokes? They like to hear people scream with laughter.
What’s a zombie’s favorite song? “Thriller” by Michael Jackson.
Why don’t zombies eat popcorn? It gets stuck in their teeth.
How does a zombie kill weeds? With a sling dead.
What does a zombie want for Christmas? Decomposition.
Why are zombies so lazy? Because they are lacking get-up-and-go.
How do zombies get around on Halloween? By dead-end transportation.
What’s a zombie’s favorite candy? M&M brains.
Why don’t zombies have their own country? They can’t defend any set borders.
Hard Zombie Riddles
What do you get when you cross a zombie with a vampire? An undead nightmare.
What happens if you wipe out a zombie hoard? Ten more rise up in their place.
How do you cure zombie-ism? With a shot directly through the brain.
What’s the only way to kill a zombie for good? Burn the remains after decapitation.
Why don’t zombies starve to death? They are already dead.
How did the zombie apocalypse first start? From a mutated virus that spread unchecked.
What’s the best weapon against a zombie attack? A zombie flame-thrower.
How do you know if someone’s becoming a zombie? Their skin pales, their temperature drops drastically, and they start craving human flesh.
What’s the best way to prevent becoming a zombie? Remove the infectious part after a zombie bite.
Why don’t zombies die from infections? Their flesh is already necrotic.
How do zombies actually move if they are dead? The virus reanimates their basic motor functions.
What distinguishes a zombie virus from other pathogens? It revives neuronal activity after death.
How was the first zombie created? Through an experimental viral therapy gone wrong.
What’s the lifespan of an average zombie? 10-20 years depending on rate of decomposition.
Do zombies ever truly die off? No, the virus lies dormant waiting for a new host.
What smell do zombies hate most? The stench of rotting flesh like their own.
Can zombies reproduce sexually? No, the only way they propagate is through transmission via bites or fluids.
What’s the most effective zombie deterrent? Fire – they hate flames.
Why don’t zombies get brain freeze? Their pain receptors have rotted away.
How do you know the zombie apocalypse is coming? More frequent attacks by the infected.
Funny Zombie Riddles
What do zombies use to spice up their recipes? Grave-y.
Why are zombies always disoriented? They lost their head ages ago.
Why don’t zombies have their own sitcom? Because the laughter track would wake the dead.
What’s a zombie’s favorite dessert? Finger food.
Why do zombies hate getting wrinkles? It’s a dead giveaway for their age.
How do zombies stay in touch? Ghoul-gle and zombieram.
What do you call a zombie who does stand up comedy? A funny dead guy.
Why did the zombie go to cooking school? To bone up on his recipes.
Why don’t zombies live together in big groups? They brainstorm too much.
What’s a zombie’s favorite food besides brains? Fried fingers and toes.
How did the zombie win the lottery? He got lucky with death numbers.
Why don’t zombies wear makeup? No amount of foundation covers dead skin.
How do zombies party? They turn up the bass to wake the dead.
Where do baby zombies come from? Zombie eggs – then they pop out of graves.
What happens when you put a zombie in a blender? You get cold dead smoothies.
Why are zombies always seen in such large groups? There’s safety in mobs for the undead.
What’s a zombie’s favorite pick up line? “I’ve got my dead eye on you.”
How do zombies stay physically fit? Lots of coffin stretches and bed lifts.
What’s a zombie’s favorite song? “Dead Man Walking.”
Why do zombies make great tenants? They don’t complain much about faulty electricity or plumbing.
Why do zombies have trouble playing rock music? Most lose fingers so they can’t fret the guitar.
What do you call a funny zombie? A deadpan comedian.
Conclusion
Zombies continue to be intriguing and creepy figures that lend themselves well to riddles and jokes. Their horror appeals to our fascination with death and the undead. Solving riddles about zombies tests our brains while tapping into our dark interests. The next time you want a fun mental challenge, try sharing these 97 zombie riddles and their spooky, funny or downright disgusting answers with friends.
